The Power of Habit

What is the greatest influence on your life?  If you think about this question, my guess is that you think of an individual who was very important to you, like a parent or teacher.  Or you might think of your faith or your your philosophy.  Or perhaps an experience (good or bad) that had an influence on you.

Well, my friend, you are wrong.  Actually it is a bit of a trick question, but after you read this blog, you might think about this question a little differently.

When I was a youth and then a young man, I became familiar with a motivational speaker and author named Og Mandino.

An author of many works, his most famous was titled The Greatest Salesman in the World. The book sold millions of copies, and I still have one on my bookshelf.  Is it a thick, complex book?  No.  Not at all.  It is remarkable in its simplicity.  

The main point of Og's book made a great impression on me and stuck with me all these years.  I hope the point will stick with you too, because I believe it is a simple, yet incredibly powerful key to a successful life.  Here is the main point:

We are a slave to our habits.  Habits influence our actions more than anything else.  It's not that habits are a stern taskmaster.  They aren't.  Except in very rare cases, it's not that we are so addicted to our habits that we can't overcome them.  We are a slave to our habits because they are a constant influencer, especially when there is not another influencer in the picture.

In other words, when we aren't thinking, when we are taking a mental break, we default to our habits.  Think about it.  This is most of the time.  Another term that is related to this concept is the idea of the subconscious mind.  Your subconscious is largely controlled by your habits.

Yes, you can consciously take deliberate actions that are motivated by thought, love, fear, appetite, and other conscious thinking.  But none of us can do this 100% of our waking hours.  Our mind takes breaks, and that's when we automatically yield to our default.  We yield to our habits.

Once we recognize we are a slave to our habits, that's when the can work to make a difference.  We can consciously work to form good habits and rid ourselves of bad ones.  

Let me stop right here to make some clarifying points.  Yes, this principle applies to major habits, like smoking or over-eating, but it applies to minor habits too, like making up your bed in the morning (or not).  Another point:  Habits aren't always good or bad.  They can be both.  They're simply what you normally do by default. Finally, habits can be habits of action or habits of thinking.

Here's a good example for our modern world.  How many of us have a habit of burying our heads in our smart phone?  I sometimes do it.  At restaurants, I see people do this while ignoring their companion across the table.  I see kids ignore their parents and parents ignore their kids.  

In a work environment, you could substitute computer for smart phone.  I'm guilty of this one.  I enjoy looking at the Wall Street Journal online, and I automatically do that way too often, when a couple times a day would be plenty.  My habit of reading the Journal is a good example of something that isn't bad in and of itself.  It is only bad because I do it too much and cost myself other productive work.

Breaking a habit and replacing it with a new one takes deliberate effort.  Your habit is yours because you are comfortable with it.  So breaking a habit will likely cause you some discomfort.  Acknowledge that and be ready for it.

You may have heard that it takes 21 days to establish a habit.  It is my understanding that this 21 day concept came from medical observations. People who lost limbs on average took 21 days before they quit sensing the missing limb.  That's how long it took their subconscious mind to reprogram itself to their new reality.

Others say the 21 days is a bit of a myth and it probably takes longer.  In reality, it probably varies based upon the person, the circumstance, and the nature of the habit.  

I'd suggest strongly committing to a month, with the idea you'll extend another month.  I'm not suggesting you cut off your arm or your leg.  That probably wouldn't do you much good.

I am suggesting that you start with one small thing that moves you away from unproductive toward productive.  You may be amazed how one small change over time can make a big difference.

I'd love to hear about your experiences with changing habits.  I believe it is one of the keys to success.